Unicorns and Fairy Dust

Today I feel I'm able to talk about my little brain, the way it effects my every day and how it impacted my life. If this is the first time you hear about some things, I'm not sorry. I've always been loud, in your face and a complete drama queen. I never let my fat thighs get in the way to podium dancing and I always had a smile on my face. I used to cackle with my laugh and everyone knew me. I loved my life, I got into uni after protesting I wasn't going to go. Then it started, my head decided to hate me. I was in a flat with awful people, people who made me feel so uncomfortable I refused to enter the kitchen. It got that bad I bought a portable hob so I could make noodles in my room. Everything spiralised out of control and I was unable to cope or to ask for help. Fast forward to May and within 3 weeks I moved back home, broke up with my boyfriend, bought a car and it blew up, costing me thousands. I had nothing, I felt like everything was going wrong. If it ...

As I sit in my tiny uni room, covered in unicorn-themed items, surrounded by empty bottles of saka water; I wonder. how did I get here? First off, I'm not at Bolton anymore. I can honestly say, it was the worst decision of my life to even think about going there. I hated it, I hated the people, I despised my shitty flat with shitty flatmates who had my life (P.S I'LL PUT MY BACON WHEREVER I WANT). I hated the course, I hated my lecturer. It made me depressed and I knew that I wasn't going to return. So I quit. I sent an email to my tutor which said "You're shit, I'm not coming back"- He hasn't replied yet. Then came the difficult part of 'Shit Anna what the fuk are you gonna do??' and then came to the constant reminder from the back of my brain that I was a failure. Somehow, through clearing and pure luck, I got into Uclan or Preston uni. And I bloody love it. I love my silly mates, I love my dirty flat, I love the nightlife and most im...

A big portion of this blog is about my body, my weight and my body confidence. Both the happy parts and the bad bits. I promised you all I would never sugar coat anything for you because I want people to see the real Anna. The first update is that I'm still fat, I'm still over weight but I can still fit into Topshop jeans so it means that I haven't put on any weight since last year. I still have dreams about being a size 8, having cheek bones and just showing off some bones in general. Then I see a cake and think "Na, lets have cake". It's a very confusing circle. I'll insert a picture below to show you a current body image of me. Coming to uni has certainly changed the way I see myself and it's helped in a massively good way. In Workington I'd never dream of going round town with a skirt on or a crop top, or even how I normally dress at uni and on nights out in Bolton. when I'm back home I feel like uni has spoilt nights out now because I ...

Hellloooooooo! It feels like forever and ever (Amen?) since I last wrote a blog post. basically, because it has been! With moving house, having no internet and my phone being a dickhead; I haven't been able to blog. I'm back though, I'm back and I'm never, ever leaving you guys ever again! In case you've missed the last few blog posts I'll link them here , here and here for you to look at! So a life update.. I'll just jump into the deep end and hope to god a attractive life guard comes and saves me... I'm hoping to go to University in September, 100 miles away from my Gran, my bed and my boyfriend. We've been going out for 8 months and the most time we've spent apart is 2 days. When and if I go to University I'll be seeing him once a month. ONCE A FUCKING MONTH. Now, this makes me sad because once a month seems like nothing but I'm also excited to see how we cope. I've also become a bit of a alcoholic in these recent...

I found out last week that I disgust people, and I was fullt clothed, wearing a bra and I wasn't swearing. So what was it? I'll tell you what it is was, it was my muffin top, my over –hang and most importantly- my flab. But you see, this flab reminds me of a time in my life when I was thinner. It’s not fat as such, it’s skin which was stretched and now is, slightly less stretched. I bought this skirt will all knowledge that my belly would stick out but I accepted that. So dear body shamers/ that girl who told me I was fat at the age of 10/ that man who told me I should only drink diet coke, yet he was drinking frosty jacks out of a bag. My belly is a part of me, I know it’s there, when I lost all my weight, it was still there. If I wear a skirt and my belly is ‘there’ don’t you dare ask if I’m pregnant, don’t you dare ask how much I weight and don’t you ever, criticize how I dress “because it doesn’t suit my body shape”. I will dress how I want, some days that’s in ...

Welcome to week 2 of my happy week series! This week has been full of exciting things, the biggest thing I'll leave to the end! I received 2 Mac lipsticks, one off Mac directly and another one I bought at a discounted price. Both are lovely in their own ways but I couldn't have purchased two totally different liptsicks! Velvet Teddy Ss you can see from the photo, I'm hideous at taking pictures of promoted products! It's such a nice colour, way more pink toned than I thought. I'm not sure if it was strange lighting in photos online but I always thought it was more brown toned. It goes on smoothly and I'll be doing a make up look based around it soon, so you'll find it here when it;s live. Overall, it's a really good lipstick and I thank Mac for sending me it! Royal Matte This lipstick I bought at a discounted price, Mac did not send me it for free. I was actually speaking to J azz and well, she always convinces me into buying things I don...